In which our heroes discuss some elections, the very important subject of biscuits, and play Heroquest. Not gonna lie, the Heroquest stuff is not our best work. Some of our purest though…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:08:13 — 67.5MB)
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In which our heroes have white privilege. Graham rants about razor blades, Adam wanks into a robot, and they rip off the format of an excellent podcast which is available at https://play.acast.com/s/offmenu
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:14:49 — 60.8MB)
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In which our heroes talk about fruit and vegetables for over an hour
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:04:11 — 49.8MB)
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In which our heroes get divorced from Jeff Amazon. Graham drinks too much Dragon Soop and damages his heart, Adam has a vomit bath, Chris enjoys retired life and Daniel once again turns up late and drunk.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:40 — 49.7MB)
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In which our heroes become covered in shit. Some other stuff happens I think, I wasn’t really listening.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:38 — 45.3MB)
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In which Adam and Chris extract a confession from Daniel. Chris gets a new phone and makes inadvisable comments about the grooming habits of football men. Brexit is discussed and everyone just feels awful about the state of the world. But then Chris does a magic wee that cheers everyone up.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:21:04 — 57.9MB)
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In which our heroes are diminished but not defeated. Chris develops a scheme to profit from his inevitable political career and Adam has a lot of problems with semantics.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:26 — 43.8MB)
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In which the real episode 161 is so bad that Chris makes a clip show instead.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:00:06 — 38.2MB)
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In which our heroes do bad things with glove puppets and end up where they were about two and a half podcasts ago.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:33:18 — 66.7MB)
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I mean, the title pretty much says it all.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:21:47 — 59.0MB)
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In which our heroes look backwards and forwards at the same time. Dan gets some pussy, Chris gets withdrawal, and Adam gets technical.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:18:18 — 56.4MB)
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In which our heroes pilot an exciting new quiz format and harass Dan about his breadbin
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:04:28 — 50.7MB)
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In which our heroes drink a lot and are joined by Alastair from Nottingham
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 2:34:36 — 119.5MB)
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In which our heroes are reunited, start a quest together and possibly accidentally kill some completely innocent goblins.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:56:31 — 83.8MB)
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In which our heroes mourn. Graham and Chris go on a pub crawl and anger some “monks”, Dan does some tedious admin.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:10:56 — 53.8MB)
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In which our diminished and depleted heroes mourn the fires in Greece, possibly violate the Official Secrets Act, plot to throw Daniel in a canal, interview one of Graham’s neighbours and eat some really loud prawn crackers that I thought it was funnier not to edit out.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:23 — 46.2MB)
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In which our heroes plan their next holiday. Chris has a haircut, Graham is a Victim Of Crime, Adam recounts his time in an escape room and Daniel [inaudible due to train noise]
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 57:42 — 45.2MB)
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In which our heroes go on a side quest. Graham and Gemma are nowhere to be found while Chris and Dan hunt for treasure. Everything goes wrong.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:49:06 — 78.0MB)
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In which our heroes resurrect an episode long thought dead, but in doing so sacrifice Graham to the dark gods of hotel internet. We also talk about computer games and shit. There’s a lovely surprise in there too!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 15:29 — 16.4MB)
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In which our heroes learn about made up meals. Graham chooses bionic enhancements for his penis, Adam slanders a teacher and Chris recalls the time he shit his pants in a shop.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:03:52 — 49.2MB)
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In which our heroes escape. Dan returns to talk about wanking, Graham bids for project work and Adam talks about gnomes.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 51:03 — 33.9MB)
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In which our heroes solve terrorism. Graham dismisses Chris’ wine drinking, Chris dismisses Graham’s gin drinking and Adam gives thanks to Jesus that he doesn’t have to provide Chris with technical support.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 57:33 — 42.2MB)
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In which our heroes yet again fail to record anything resembling a podcast. Adam repays his debt to society, Graham disrespects other peoples sensitive information (AGAIN) and Christopher contemplates the moral maze of accidentally acquired children and boy monkey weeing. Also, face crabs.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 48:03 — 34.4MB)
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In which Christopher solves his computer problem. Adam recalls his (obviously homo-erotic) dream about Graham. Graham offends many women and Christopher with his crude language and everyone agrees on plans for white genocide.
PLUS – we launch an exciting listener competition.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:13:16 — 55.3MB)
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In which our heroes suffer Chris problems. Chris is absent for the first 8 minutes despite being present, Graham talks about shitting a lot and Adam segues from bell ends to bell curves.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 54:41 — 42.0MB)
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In which our heroes are joined by David from Birmingham whom they try to doxx again, as well as discussing problematic neighbours and deciding what kind of post-Brexit dystopia they’d prefer
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:02:21 — 49.0MB)
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In which our heroes are joined by Brandon who teaches them about the mystical land of America
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:11:58 — 56.7MB)
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In which our heroes talk mostly about poo (but also wee) for over an hour and run out of time to do an actual podcast.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:07:09 — 50.9MB)
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In which our heroes insult a listener, abandon a long-term podcast project, go on a speed awareness course and talk about toilets & poo for a very, very long time.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:10:31 — 55.6MB)
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In which our heroes buy booze and talk about Gangster’s Wives, the greatest film yet to be made
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 56:47 — 44.8MB)
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In which Christopher advocates drowning children and possibly breaks the official secrets act and Graham recycles content from previous episodes. More is revealed about Graham’s new neighbour in a way that Adam would probably have prevented, so it is definitely his fault for not supervising.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:00:29 — 46.1MB)
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In which our heroes travel to Bangkok. Adam becomes a murderer for hire, Graham gets into a fight with a muscle man and Chris falls in love. Dan remains unaccounted for.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:07:19 — 50.7MB)
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In which our heroes drink some mysterious liquid which arrived by post, discuss cannibalism, Japanese trains & the Parisian helicopter prison break, and muse on the fact that IT’S COMING HOME
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:38 — 49.0MB)
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In which our heroes ride the Megabus, dream about Jacob Rees Mogg and frequent glory holes
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:08:05 — 54.6MB)
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In which our heroes look at pictures of tiny aeroplanes (yes, really, on a podcast) and plan a podcast outing. Graham disrespects the heroes of war and Chris and Dan make many single item lists.
There are no new years resolutions (which helps to approximately date this historical offering).
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:04:48 — 47.1MB)
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In which our heroes go to a ginger wedding, have thoughts about things, bully Daniel into singing and Chris impresses everyone with his current up to date musical references.
PLUS – A story about Ruddy William.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:00:06 — 43.1MB)
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In which our heroes sit back, relax, and generally chill out. Graham makes himself a nice Gin and Tonic, Adam silences the annoying cats and cars in his life and Dan gets his dick out in the light of a burning dustbin to impress a lady.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 32:27 — 23.1MB)
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In which our heroes bang on about GDPR and Jumani, have a stress wank, invent a cocktail and find Dan a wife
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 59:41 — 44.8MB)
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In which our two surviving heroes discuss films, “canon” and the misadventures of Sajid Javid. The train noises are 100% intentional
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 31:22 — 24.8MB)
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In which our heroes discuss quality tv, wrestle with GDPR, discuss the local elections, debrief from their expedition into the countryside and conduct a scientific study into what constitutes a sea.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 55:08 — 54.3MB)
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In which our heroes wrestle with poor audio quality for the first 20 minutes. Adam plays fantasy government, Chris joins ISIS and Dan gets off his tits on ketamine.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:07:24 — 50.3MB)
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In which our heroes get under a towel, plan Graham’s death by (sexual) misadventure, stumble upon actual content, threaten multiple regicide, libel a twinkle and then use their excellent internet sleuthing skills to track another one down.
Editors note: this one is a real mess, but quite a funny mess.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:18:10 — 58.2MB)
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In which our heroes discuss bum disease, Graham speaks ill of Stuart Baggs the Dead Brand, Daniel continues to misunderstand veganism and Chris has a dirty weekend away with Michael Portillo
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:00:43 — 43.4MB)
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In which our heroes bring down Facebook. Dan categorises all food into Vegan and Non-Vegan, Adam wanks on about Data Protection and Chris buys a new sofa made of hummus.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 47:20 — 33.9MB)
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In which our heroes explore veganism and terrorism, perform a comparative ethnography of Friends and revel in the snow.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:03:24 — 45.8MB)
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In which our heroes perform an offensive radio play, discuss cream teas (again), and Chris goes insane whilst editing it all.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:13:07 — 51.4MB)
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In which our heroes plan for the pornpocalypse by developing niche fetishes, serve notice to Ruddy William, talk about films and TV for ages and are sick in a Wetherspoons.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:17:26 — 58.8MB)
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In which our heroes suffer from the Mandella effect. Adam laments the lack of televised penises, Dan does some cooking, Chris talks about some of his favourite episodes from Friends and Graham freestyles a diss track about David from Birmingham with surprisingly adequate results.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:03:45 — 58.4MB)
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In which our heroes plan the first strike in Graham’s podcast insurgency. Dan gets down and dirty with the girl scouts, Adam gets into dirty videos and Chris just gets dirty in a toilet.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:01:27 — 41.3MB)
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In which our heroes are interviewed to figure out just what the fuck they’ve been up to lately.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 42:49 — 26.9MB)
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