All posts by Adam

Dungeons and Dickheads IN SPACE: Episode 5 – Part 1

In which our heroes rush in. Someone gets shot, someone gets tied up, and someone briefly contemplates pissing on a bed.

This episode was originally over 3 hours long so we’ve split it into two parts. Part 2 coming soon!

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Dungeons and Dickheads IN SPACE: Episode 1

In which our heroes arrive on Tycho Station in search of space drugs. Chris makes a new friend, Graham threatens several people, and Dan attempts to bribe everyone.

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Dungeons and Dickheads IN SPACE: Episode 0

In which our heroes prepare to embark on a new adventure. Dan is a space Tory, Chris works to bring down the government from within, and Graham really wants to punch someone.

The game we will be playing is The Expanse RPG from Green Ronin

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Episode 221 – Nipples of The Rich & Famous

In which our heroes are on film. Dan steps up his OnlyFans output, Chris mourns the death of Prince Philip, Adam despairs, and Graham ices some nipples.

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Episode 217 – Olfactory Brown Note

In which our heroes contemplate lockdown. Chris speedruns Dry January, Graham teaches his children a lesson, Dan steals food from the NHS, and Adam watches Danish TV.

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Episode 213 – Murder Preferences

In which our heroes celebrate International Men’s Day. Adam contracts COVID-19, Graham solves a crime, Dan plans a crime, and Chris ranks some counties.

This weeks episode of the Two Star Podcast is brought to you by malaise. Malaise, it’s why this took a month to edit.

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Episode 209 – The G Is Always Hard

In which our heroes are buried alive. Dan is late, Chris has a lot of questions, Graham flees the city, and Adam tampers with some recordings.

Don’t forget you can join our Discord server here: https://discord.gg/keqeY4H and support us on Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/twostarpodcast.

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Episode 206 – Ranked Sex

In which our heroes are halved. Adam plays football while Dan swims. The crushing weight of reality bares heavy upon them.

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Episode 200 – The Big Two Ooo Ooo

In which our heroes celebrate a big round number. Chris falls in love with himself, Dan verifies his reach, Graham gets very angry about the Amiga, and Adam wears a shirt.

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Episode 196 – Lockdown Fuck Bubble

In which our heroes sign off on project completion. Chris plans for retirement, Adam starts a new job, and Dan ***** a lady with **** **** in *** ******* after serveral ******* ** ****.

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Episode 193 – Large Hadron Vagina

In which our heroes delve into extreme body modification. Adam goes kite fighting, Chris is late for work, Graham enjoys some bukakke, and Dan fakes it with yoghurt.

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Episode 191 – The OnlyFans of Podcasts

In which our heroes scream into the void. Dan starts an OnlyFans, Chris has a Midnight Run, Graham examines his bum bones, and Adam lurks menacingly.

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Episode 188 – Pavlovian Shitting

In which our heroes breach the lockdown. Dan sunbathes naked in a park, Chris forces unwanted eggs on children, Graham soils himself in meetings, and Adam becomes a 5G truther.

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Episode 183 – Echoes of Yesterday

In which our heroes suffer audio maladies. Chris turns up late, Dan clips and echoes, and Adam is a free agent. Also in this episode, introducing new podcast member Will Nortico.

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Episode 179 – Bathtime!

In which our heroes are short-staffed due to scheduling issues. Adam hands in his notice and Dan builds a sex toy empire. This episode smells like my vagina.

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Episode 176 – Portuguese Sexytimes

In which our heroes have technical difficulties. Chris is AWOL, Graham has a stalking relapse, Dan enjoys Friends, and Adam is deathly ill.

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Episode 173 – Muted Construction Noises

Note: This is a repost of 173 because Dan linked the wrong audio and some feeds won’t update with the correct one.

In which our heroes discuss their upcoming holidays, complain about how shit things are and reflect on the latest techniques for keeping cool.

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Episode 171 – Dubstep Bill

In which our heroes apologise for everything. Dan goes to Glastonbury, Graham attempts to kidnap the Funhouse Twins, and Adam keeps forgetting to edit the episode.

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Episode 162 – Offensive Ponds

In which our heroes are diminished but not defeated. Chris develops a scheme to profit from his inevitable political career and Adam has a lot of problems with semantics.

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Episode 159 – Bigger Than A Bread Bin

In which our heroes look backwards and forwards at the same time. Dan gets some pussy, Chris gets withdrawal, and Adam gets technical.

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Dungeons & Dickheads Season 2: Part Double Zero

In which our heroes mourn. Graham and Chris go on a pub crawl and anger some “monks”, Dan does some tedious admin.

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Dungeons & Dickheads Season 2: Part Zero

In which our heroes go on a side quest. Graham and Gemma are nowhere to be found while Chris and Dan hunt for treasure. Everything goes wrong.

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Episode 156 – Escape Room Frolics

In which our heroes escape. Dan returns to talk about wanking, Graham bids for project work and Adam talks about gnomes.

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Episode 153 – Hardwired Christ

In which our heroes solve terrorism. Graham dismisses Chris’ wine drinking, Chris dismisses Graham’s gin drinking and Adam gives thanks to Jesus that he doesn’t have to provide Chris with technical support.

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Episode 150 – The Chris Is Silent

In which our heroes suffer Chris problems. Chris is absent for the first 8 minutes despite being present, Graham talks about shitting a lot and Adam segues from bell ends to bell curves.

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Episode 143 – General Dan’s Penis Regulations

In which our heroes travel to Bangkok. Adam becomes a murderer for hire, Graham gets into a fight with a muscle man and Chris falls in love. Dan remains unaccounted for.

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Episode 140 – The Two Star Podcast Chillout Room

In which our heroes sit back, relax, and generally chill out. Graham makes himself a nice Gin and Tonic, Adam silences the annoying cats and cars in his life and Dan gets his dick out in the light of a burning dustbin to impress a lady.

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Episode 134 – Good Things Come To Those Who…

In which our heroes wrestle with poor audio quality for the first 20 minutes. Adam plays fantasy government, Chris joins ISIS and Dan gets off his tits on ketamine.

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Episode 131 – Meat Does Not Shatter

In which our heroes bring down Facebook. Dan categorises all food into Vegan and Non-Vegan, Adam wanks on about Data Protection and Chris buys a new sofa made of hummus.

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Episode 126 – Girl Scout Diss Tracks

In which our heroes plan the first strike in Graham’s podcast insurgency. Dan gets down and dirty with the girl scouts, Adam gets into dirty videos and Chris just gets dirty in a toilet.

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Episode 121 – End of The Year Review

In which our heroes look back on the year that was and make bold predictions about the year that will be. Can you believe we’ve been doing this nonsense for 3.5 years? The internet has a lot to answer for. See you all in 2018!

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Episode 117 – Technical Assistance

In which our heroes give up on trying to record a Dungeons & Dickheads episode and coerce a drunk Chris into buying a new computer.

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Episode 115 – Echoes of Christopher

In which our heroes spoil the joke. Dan nerds out about spaceships, Adam rants about Twitter, and the long forgotten remnants of Chris echo throughout the podcast.

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Episode 111 – Dismembering The Dead

In which our heroes plan a funeral. Chris doesn’t pay attention, Adam talks nonsense about elves and Dan demonstrates a complete lack of knowledge about undertakers.

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Episode 108 – Who Doxes The Doxmen?

In which our heroes make amends and learn all about Neil Morrissey. Chris buys some furniture, Dan begins a career in esports and Adam becomes a disciple of Khorne.

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Episode 105 – Russia By Gaslight

In which our heroes travel to far-away Nottingham. Adam can’t be bothered to edit out a washing machine, Chris colludes with the Russians and Dan definitely gets put in a bin.

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Episode 98 – Moors Murders: Tokyo Drift

In which our heroes sing about Roger Moore. Dan invents some awful sex toys, Graham unveils his new business venture, Adam buys some drugs, and Chris starts self-harming.

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Episode 94 – The Sound of Trains

In which our heroes go trainspotting. Graham suffers performance issues, Chris starts his own detective agency, Adam handles dead animals and Dan is on a train.

I apologise for the (even by our standards) poor quality audio of this week’s episode but it was stitched together from 18 separate source recordings and Dan lives in a trainyard.

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Episode 90 – Euthanasia The Video Game

In which our heroes delve into console classism. Graham goes into space, Chris makes a racist friend, Adam has twins and Dan bakes an actual cake.

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Episode 85 – Roll For Fucking

In which our heroes play Dungeons and Dragons, Chris is replaced by a robot at several points, Graham recovers from his crippling bum disease and Adam starts a petition to ban the podcast.

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Episode 81 – Pumping Coleslaw Into Memes

In which Adam tries really fucking hard to edit out all the background noise but is thwarted by Dan banging around his room doing god-knows what for the entire recording.

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Episode 77 – Jean Paul Gaultier’s Euro-Christmas

In which our heroes bravely struggle on without Dan. Graham argues with a Terminator, Chris takes some heroin and Adam brings down a major sports brand.

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