All posts by Chris

Episode 155 – Fly Tipping Children

In which our heroes yet again fail to record anything resembling a podcast.  Adam repays his debt to society, Graham disrespects other peoples sensitive information (AGAIN) and Christopher contemplates the moral maze of accidentally acquired children and boy monkey weeing.  Also, face crabs.

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Episode 152 – One In One Out

In which Christopher solves his computer problem.  Adam recalls his (obviously homo-erotic) dream about Graham.  Graham offends many women and Christopher with his crude language and everyone agrees on plans for white genocide.

PLUS – we launch an exciting listener competition.

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Episode 148 – Brown Underpant Crime

In which our heroes talk mostly about poo (but also wee) for over an hour and run out of time to do an actual podcast.

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Episode 145 – Eggs, Eggs and More Eggs

In which Christopher advocates drowning children and possibly breaks the official secrets act and Graham recycles content from previous episodes.  More is revealed about Graham’s new neighbour in a way that Adam would probably have prevented, so it is definitely his fault for not supervising.

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Episode 122 – Flying Banana Boats

In which our heroes look at pictures of tiny aeroplanes (yes, really, on a  podcast) and plan a podcast outing.  Graham disrespects the heroes of war and Chris and Dan make many single item lists.

There are no new years resolutions (which helps to approximately date this historical offering).

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Episode 138 – Constipated Politics

In which our heroes go to a ginger wedding, have thoughts about things, bully Daniel into singing and  Chris impresses everyone with his current up to date musical references.

PLUS – A story about Ruddy William.

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Episode 133 – Hotel Asphixy Wank Death

In which our heroes get under a towel, plan Graham’s death by (sexual) misadventure, stumble upon actual content, threaten multiple regicide, libel a twinkle and then use their excellent internet sleuthing skills to track another one down.

Editors note: this one is a real mess, but quite a funny mess.

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Episode 129 – Fairly Conventional Nipples

In which our heroes plan for the pornpocalypse by developing niche fetishes, serve notice to Ruddy William, talk about films and TV for ages and are sick in a Wetherspoons.

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Episode 125 – PODCAST TERRORISM!

In which our heroes use a new recording platform, Chris gets taken into public ownership, Graham fails to reignite enthusiasm for the podcast war and they invent an excellent game (if you were in the same school and year as them).  There is a hidden easter egg of Adam being intermittently bothered by a cat.

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Episode 118 – The Dan and Chris Show Episode 1 (Pilot)

In which both Adam and Graham are away so Daniel is trusted with the buttons, Chris tries yet again to seduce him and they tackle the big issues like how to enjoy chocolate and which limb to amputate.

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Dungeons & Dickheads Part III

In Which Graham and Gemma share a microphone, Gemma has a sex dream, Daniel leaves our heroes to escape from prison and Christopher plays a secret game for the amusement of Christian from Scotland.   Christopher then kills a guard in a very troubling way and then they all go to the pub.

Bard music is by Jack Wright, https://youtu.be/h-RIsgsmN1M

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Episode 110 – Why Did Dan Blush? Because the Seaweed (Gin)

In which our heroes do boring admin (on a beautiful spreadsheet), struggle at maths, plan Elton John’s Funeral and Disrespect the Wu Tang Clan (and Bruce Forsyth).

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Episode 107 – Technical Difficulties

In which Adam abandons his duties as responsible adult and as a result the children suffer severe technical difficulties.  They get their revenge by choosing a title that will annoy him and then stalk their newest superfan (JAMES FROM CRAWLEY) for about an hour.

To be honest, this is probably more of interest to the police as evidence than as an entertainment.

For those of you asking (no-one has asked), Graham’s silly parkour video is here:

Christopher’s (second and far superior) spoof survival video is here:

 

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Episode 102 – Dirty Daniel and the Shoe Fetishists

In which our heroes plan a bespoke live episode for Dave from Birmingham, Chris seeks poo advice and remembers that he is friends with a pervert (not Graham!), Graham confesses to voyeurism and plagiarism and Daniel is a DIRTY, DIRTY BOY.

Edit – He played Gethin.

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Episode 99 ~ The Mild Exorcism of Christopher’s Lower Abdomen

In which Graham diagnoses what will kill Christopher to death, Adam tries to convince his animated corpse to go to a music festival and yet again they completely fail to record anything even remotely resembling a podcast.  THERE ARE DEFINITELY NO WORMS IN CHRISTOPHER’S POO!

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Episode 96 ~ Michael Portillo’s Closeted Cheese Board

In which our heroes gorge themselves on cheese, survive food poisoning and Graham looks forward to his inevitable decline into dementia; all topped off with a return visit to the first dates restaurant!

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Episode 92 – LADS special

In which our heroes attempt to be TOTAL LADS and MEGA TOP BLOKES for a whole episode by doing BANTZ and thinking about TITS and BEER.  We plan a new career for Ken Livingstone, offer PR advice to Pepsi, Adam does another car crash which is obviously his fault, Daniel reveals how John Major seduced him and Chris plans a brilliant prank on Graham.

 

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Episode 88 – Episode 89’s poorly conceived prequel

In which our heroes fantasise about a sweaty Daniel in tiny shorts, stalk a listener, create a classic comic character and enjoy a plethora of listener feedback.

Mostly this: http://jimllpaintit.tumblr.com/image/157657804219

 

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Episode 83 – Daniel’s Creepy D&D Sex Swing (AKA Episode 78 part 3)

In which our heroes solve racism, sign up to enter the crystal maze, do goat yoga and generally reminisce about the 1980s, Daniel constructs a woman trap and Graham goes beyond creepy.

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Episode 78 part 2 – The Never Ending Podcast

In which we meet our diversity quota, force Stavrina to become the mistress of Jacob Rees Mogg, join extremist vegans in plotting death to the west and enjoy our shared foreskin/medical toy fetish, all whilst Chris refuses to start or end the podcast properly.  FIGHT THE POWER!

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Episode 78 part 1 – Racist Bus Tours

In which our heroes are joined by superfan Stavrina who takes them on a racist tram ride.  Chris faints,  Graham drinks paint thinner, we set up a company to exploit racists, Stavrina learns who Jeremy Beadle is and reveals her bizarre toilet habits, all whilst  Adam gets increasingly frustrated with Chris for failing to start the podcast.

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